Matthew 7:7-11
"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." James 1:17
Our Father loves His children and delights in doing good for us, and He has demonstrated that in many concrete ways in our lives. I would like to list some of them, so you can praise and thank Him with us!
* This morning, Ben & I got haircuts. I have always cut Ben's hair up to this point, but he's about a month overdue, and since he wants a "style" now, it takes longer than a buzz with the clippers. I just didn't have time before we leave next week. The woman who cuts my hair is the owner of the salon and is familiar with my story; the woman who cut Ben's hair is a patient at the chiropractic office where I work, so she knows me, too. When I went up to pay, they said today's haircuts were on them and wished me well on my journey to Mexico--what an unexpected blessing!
* Yesterday in the mail we received insurance checks reimbursing us for about 90% of the cost of all the hyperbaric oxygen treatments I received last year. The total was about $3700! I really thought the chance of our insurance covering them was slim to none, since they were ordered by a doctor who owns an alternative clinic and since the diagnosis was cancer, but my God has no trouble accomplishing the nearly impossible!
* My boss came up with a super fundraising idea for me. He is an avid ultra-marathon trail runner, and lots of our patients follow his races and accomplishments. He has a 50 mile trail race coming up in May, and he decided to seek sponsorships for each mile of that race. There are posters all over the office, and he explained it in our monthly office newsletter this past week. His goal is to get $50 sponsored for each of the 50 miles which would equal $2500 raised for "Kim's Cause." It has been exciting to see the response so far in such a short time! (I guess I can't make fun of his "crazy running habit" anymore. :) )
*My sister, brother-in-law, and one niece drove over from Michigan last weekend just to see us before we leave for Mexico, and it was a really good, though short, visit. My sister took me shopping to get some Valentine's Day gifts for Heidi, Ben, and Rose that we can leave for them to open, since Valentine's Day is the day after we leave. She also bought me some lounge pants and capris that actually fit. :) Another thoughtful gift!
* A couple weekends ago, the group "Butch's Army" held another brat fry fundraiser for me which raised several more hundred dollars despite the cold winter weather. This group has been a tremendous blessing to us as they seek to assist cancer patients, and their troops are full of special people! (How do you know you live in Wisconsin? You have a brat fry in January!)
* As always, the steady stream of donations, meals, gift cards, etc., has continued as well as cards, encouraging words, and promises of prayer. I can't even put into words how overwhelming it all is. I know people do this kind of thing all the time, but to be the recipient of it is just unspeakably amazing!
As incredible as all the support is, there is something just a bit more special and touching when it comes from children. Their notes induce laughter and tears together. Our daughter, Rose, left me a note one day with all of the $6 she had to her name. Three of my nephews each wrote a card with some of their money--the youngest one gave me all of his $4 which he had won at New Year's Eve Bingo at a family gathering. We all know how important a few dollars is to a kid, so the fact that they have such tender, giving hearts is tear-jerking. My boss's two children just sent me a colored picture and hand-written card this week, and again they were very sweet. I will put photos of them below, so you can enjoy just how sweet and special and heart-melting they are!
* Two different times in the past couple weeks, I have had fellow believers stop and pray over me when we met...it is indescribable to feel God's presence when "two or three are gathered in [His] name." One was a fellow patient at the clinic in Fond du Lac...I ran into him and his wife as we were checking out one day, and they prayed with me right there in the reception area. Yesterday, my friend Tammy was my chauffer for the day (we have a blast road-tripping together to treatments, and we almost always spend time in prayer as she's driving me around the tri-county area), and we ran into one of her friends in a health food store where we stopped in between appointments. After chatting for several minutes, her friend also prayed over me right in the store aisle. Mutual fellowship with brothers and sisters in Christ is sweet, and all of the beleivers God has put in my path have truly been a gift from God!
* Tears...tears are one of God's good gifts. Tears of gratitude, tears of joy, and even tears of pain. I used to be called the "ice queen" for good reason, but not anymore! Tears come regularly now, and that's a good thing. Tears of pain can be cleansing, and I've learned not to try to stop them all the time. Sometimes having a good cry for several minutes offers a release that allows me to cope with the pain better afterward.
* Pain can be a gift, too. It develops empathy for others in pain and helps put things in perspective. It can help you find levels of strength you didn't know you had, or it can drive you to your knees and demand dependency on God's strength when you have none left of your own.
I have been doing really well the past week or so, since I got better pain meds, and several people have remarked on how good I look, so I know it's not just me. ;) The difference made in physical appearance and wellness, and in mental outlook is significant between struggling with pain and having relief from pain. And since pain is virtually the only outward symptom I experience, when it is absent, there is really no indication that I am a stage IV cancer patient.
I have been alternating two Aleve with one hydrocodone every six hours--so I am only taking each medication every 12 hours--and it has been working really well. Many times I will find myself noticing that it has been longer than six hours since I last took meds, because I wasn't having any pain. But I don't wait until I have pain to take more medicine...I stay in front of it.
I have discovered one weird quirk with my leg pain. There is something about lying down in bed that triggers the pain to flare up briefly. Every. Single. Time. When I go to bed my leg will start hurting 30-45 minutes after I lie down. This also explains why a couple of the treatments I've had (lying flat on the PEMF mat and lying down for the lymphatic massage treatment) caused my leg pain to flare up a bit. It hasn't been the worst severe pain but bad enough that I can't ignore it and fall asleep, so I get back up and go out to the living room and watch TV for an hour to hour and a half before it subsides on its own without having to take more meds. This past week I figured out that I can "trick" my body by lying down earlier in the afternoon/evening, waiting for the inevitable pain, getting up and going about my business, and then, when I really want to go to bed for the night, it won't bother me again, and I can fall asleep and sleep all night. I don't know why or how it works, but it does, so I've been doing it all week with great success.
I have definitely lost more weight than I wanted. I weigh about 115 pounds which is 10-15 pounds less than the minimum where I'm comfortable...and I am wearing the same size pant as Rose, who is 12 years old--not cool! I know I've lost muscle, too, because I have basically been unable to even walk for exercise since last June. For awhile I lost weight because my stomach was "off," and food didn't always sound good. Although my appetite has been normal for the past couple months, I'm still just maintaining that weight. I believe at this point it is due to my busy schedule. I'm driving between appointments a lot, and the places I go are 30 minutes, 45 minutes, or an hour away. Plus, sometimes there are eating restrictions with treatments--for instance I can't eat for two hours before a colonics appointment, and I can't eat for 30-45 minutes after taking some of my supplements. Anyway, I am counting on gaining some weight back while I'm in Mexico, because all my treatments will be in one place and a chef will be preparing all my organic meals for me.
The kids seem to be pretty excited about me going to Mexico, because they know this is what I need to do to get better. Bob has been very upbeat the past week or so as our departure date draws nearer for much the same reason. He has independently made some surprising plans for the trip, too. He had read on the Mexico clinic's website that we could bring pictures and things to make our room more homey, and it was suggested that we consider leaving something in the room to encourage the next patient who occupies it. So he took care of it by talking to our pastor's wife, who hand paints beautiful barn wood custom pieces, and she made two signs for us to take. He also printed out a family photo and had Heidi print out the words to "Jesus, Draw Me Ever Nearer" and put them in frames.
Being apart from our kids for three weeks straight is not something we have ever done before, so it will be a new experience for all of us, and we can't be exactly sure how it will affect us. We can, however, count on God's loving hand to uphold us all through the experience.
Our second oldest daughter, Holly, is home from Iowa this weekend to spend time with us before we leave next week, and we're all very happy about that! We haven't seen Holly as much as we've seen our oldest, Emily, who was home for a whole week at Thanksgiving and for another week in early January.
We have several little things to do this weekend before our trip besides packing. so we will be busy. I am not working or having any treatments on Monday, since I will most likely need that day to finish making preparations, but I will stop in at work to say good-bye before I leave. I said good-byes to everyone at the Fond du Lac clinic, the Inochi clinic in West Bend, and the colonics office this past week. Everyone wished me well or ensured they will be praying and said they can't wait to hear how everything goes. I was at the bank this morning to send the wire transfer of funds to the Mexico clinic, and the ladies in the bank wished me well, too.
I'm hoping to be able to post updates while we're in Mexico, but I'm not entirely sure how reliable the internet will be nor how tired I'll be. At the least we will have some relatives post updates on Facebook.
Thank you all again for the faithful prayer support, encouragement, and financial gifts that God has used to make this trip possible! We have seen Him work miracles and answer so many prayers already, and I have been thanking Him in advance for the good gifts with which I know He is going to continue to bless us!
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